I was in France this november, for 3 weeks, and this is partly what the trip consisted.

I wish everything was different
But what sense does it make
When all you do is
ignoring me,

Lol. Är så jävla rolig såhär på kvällskvisten.

Om att känna sig så oälskad att hjärtat brister
Att veta att man gjort allt i sin makt
Men inget uppskattades
Inget märktes
Inget betydde något
Att veta att han inte ville ha mig
Förrän det var för sent
Och att han gjorde som han gjorde den där eftermiddagen för två månader sedan.
Det är nog det som gör ondast

Going to have a photography assignment today. 

Hopefully it'll go well.

After school I'm going to meet up with Alex to have some coffee or something.

  

 Met up with Dorthea today to study for a bit and drink coffee. Was nice.

Tomorrow I'm going out for a coffee with Alex, will be....interesting.

Received an A- in English today, sosososososo happy about that!

And yeah ....
talked to Alex for the first time in weeks today, felt...weird to say the least.
texted Jimmy for the first time in a week and we've decided on staying friends, which was a big relief, yet, it's still sad since we less than a month ago decided on being gf/bf, but whatever. That might still be on later. Who knows right?
Also, I got a call from one of my closest friends whom I haven't spoken to for months, felt good. Missed the actual call though, which sucks.

My mind keeps fucking with me,
as always.

Fortfarande hjärtekrossad.
Saknar honom så jävla mycket.
Och våra långa samtal om nätterna hjälper ju inte direkt.
Jag inser bara mer och mer hur mycket jag faktiskt älskar dig.
Tillsammans eller ej
Du kommer alltid vara mitt allt.

Vet inte vad som är rätt och vad som är fel längre.
Färgar mitt hår i behov av någon slags förändring.
Försöker finna någon slags stabilitet i vardagen, men det slutar mest i kaos.
Jag vet ju att ni  bara blir besvikna på mig oavsett vad jag gör.
Finner min tröst i de få vännerna jag faktiskt har kvar.

Men annars då?
Tja, jag vet faktiskt inte.

Missing Alex more and more for every day.
It's good we're still friends though, even if he acts like quite a bitch from time to time.
But i can't blame him.


Going on a date this saturday btw, will be fun, I hope.

Broke up with Alex today.
This fucking sucks.

Okej
Det blev inte riktigt som jag hade tänkt mig idag.
Med oss.
Jag åkte dit för att göra slut, men istället funderar jag på att ge honom en sista chans
Han förtjänar det egentligen inte
Men jag älskar honom så jävla mycket.

 

Efter idag finns vi inte mer.

Inget mer du och jag.

och det gör så jävlajävlajävlajävla ont.

 Förstår inte varför du gjorde som du gjorde.

Eller jo, på sätt och vis.

Men jag orkar inte bli besviken mer

Orkar inte bli så sjukt sårad.

Är bara så jävla förstörd.

Found out yesterday that Alex has been cheating on me, once again.
So yeah, going to break up with him tomorrow or something.
This sucks
I miss my best friend whom I haven't seen in almost a month...
Well yeah, that's pretty much it for now.

Orkar inte känna mig så sjukt jävla oälskad här hemma längre.
Orkar inte bli klagad på jämt och ständigt.
Inte heller orkar jag fortsätta höra på hur sjukt ansvarslös och värdelös jag är.
Hur jag gör er besvikna varje dag.

Om ni nu är så jävla trötta på mig, varför skivckar ni inte bara iväg mig?
Orkar inte.

 

So yeah, this is the result of the schoolproject with the theme "17 years".

Decided to make it some sort of "Love of a 17-year old" or something like that, what do you guys think? :)

Ok, so I made a new, more colorful Tumblr today.
Still using my B/W aswell though, so you guys should go and follow me on both!
(Click the pictures to get to each blog)
xxxxxx

Hmmm, thinking 'bout using this picture for my schoolproject, but I'm not sure, might be showing off too much.

What do you guys think?

Ok, so apparantly my parents are thinking about sending me to a foster home.

 

I've spent these last few days with Alexander, school and a bunch of homeworks.

Today I'm going to have the biggest history exam ever and I've been nervous for about a week, can't remember anything I'm going to say, awesome huh?! ....

Also, I've started talking to everyone in my class, which is great!

Seeing Alex after school, lovelovelove!

Summary of 2011 - Better late than never

                                                                         January

 

 

1&2. Took some pictures at school, I was miserable and everything felt kinda grey and boring. Longed for the summer.

February

 

 

 

1. Went out for walks in the snow

2.Went to my parents friends house and hung out with their supercute baby

3. Celebrated Anna's 17th bithday with some other lovely friends. <3

March

 

1.Cut my hair, and the fucking hairdresser cut it way too short

2.Went out for some coffee with my mother, was very nice and I had thebest chocolate cake ever.

3. Went out for some bowling one night at Mariatorget with my parents, was very fun and the place was so cosy. You could watch old music videos while playing, so so fun! 

4.Met the lovely Flora, whom I hadn't seen for way too long. Drank coffee at Ringen, went to Myrorna and other nice stuff.

Also, started talking to Kris.

April

 

 

 

 

 

                              

 1.Met Dorthea for the first time in a year and it was so so nice! 

2. Celebrated my cousin's birthday, she's so cute!

3. Went to Moderna Museet to take some pictures for a school project

4. Me and Anna went to the cosy antique shop in Gamla stan

5. Went on late night walks with Diaz

6. Anna during a cosy lunch at Obsan

7. Me

May

 

1. Slept over at Dorthea's for the first time

2. Our neighbour's rabbit kept on coming in to our garden, it was ok though, since it's so incredibly cute and fluffy!

4&5. Dorthea slept over at my place for the first time, we went to such a lame party.

June

 

 

 

   

 

1. Bought the best NIN-tank top ever!

2&5. Walked down to the beach with Anna

3. Slept over at Dorthy's

4. Started living on my floor, it was really cosy <3 Watched Skins and Doctor Who

6. Went to the city with Anna one day and sat down for a bit in a hidden park and had deep conversations

7. Helped Anna shooting one of her ideas

Started talking to Thomas aswell, whom now is one of my closest friends, yep! 

July

 

 

 

 

1. Went to the city with Diaz and chilled on a wall

2.Went to Utö with a couple of friends, was really fun!

3. Played Uno with Anna one day

4. Took lots of nightwalks with Diaz aswell

August

   

   

 

 

 

 

1. Confused and miserable

2.Went down to the beach one day with Anna and Ninja

3.Went to Stockholm film festival, with Diaz, Jenny and Anna

4. Became happier again

5&6. Took pictures of insects

September

 

Didn't have that many pictures from September, but I went down to Gothenburg one weekend, with my mother, to visit my aunt and her boyfriend. Was very cosy.

October

1. Dyed my hair darker and dipdyed my hairtips blue and I loved it.

2. Went to Drottningholm and took more pictures for schoolprojects

November

Wanted a change and ended up with the most amazing boy in the world.

December

Kind of forgot I had a camera which means I don't have any picrtures from it.